Warmth
by Moonsetta
Summary: Requested by Naboorulez."Be happy…" a voice whispered as the warmth grew warmer by his heart before it seemed to melt into him, "I'm always with you."


This is a story requested by Naboorulez. I'm aware I focus on Leo a lot and have a bad habit of killing him, or nearly killing him but that's just who I am. I hate thinking of a younger sibling dieing before an older one. I don't understand these feelings since I have no younger siblings but I'm going to try this.

And Naboorulez, I hope you're reading this. I would've responded back to you but I couldn't. Why is that people will rant long and hard against something I write but never let me write back? People, I'm not going to explode. You don't like something, tell me. Now if you don't mind Naboorulez, I'd like to quote the review you left on my story, "My Own."

"Your stories are interesting, suspenseful and sweet. They take the bonding of all four brothers as a very important theme. But the plots are getting a little repetitive. We've already red what the brother's reactions would be if Leo passed or was hurt. I think it's time to show how Leo would react if he had lost a brother. It could be just a one shot, its just to get a feel of all of Leo's reactions. Call it a request I think it would be nice to see a different version of the classic Leo tragedy."

I'd be happy to write this. I guess I focus on Leo because he's the eldest. The loss of an older sibling is just the only feeling I can understand. I lost my older half-sister 20 years before I was born and my older half-brother I've seen maybe 12 times in the 16 years I've been alive. He isn't really my brother in spirit, just in blood, I know my dead relatives more than him, so it's really the only thing I can empathize with. I have thought about writing stories where Leo loses one of his younger brothers but every time I go to write it I get stuck or lose track of what I'm writing because I just can't describe what Leo would be feeling because I can't feel anything even remotely close. But this was a request, so I'm going to try…

Now I don't normally accept requests, but I do think I need to improve in this so I'll make an exception.

I don't own TMNT.

Here we go, how do I know I'm going to hate this?

* * *

A breeze lifted a few leaves from the ground as the autumn wind began giving into the grip of winter's slow moving essence of a freezing soul. The tree trunks around the quiet forest in Northampton gave way into an open field, where a lone figure sat in front of a closed grave. The stone seemed second rate, chipped edges stuck out like the wrong view of life. This wasn't supposed to happen, but it did. The sun shone brightly for a few seconds as it peeked out from behind the clouds, as if staring down while offering an invisible helping hand to the lone figure.

And that was just it.

He sat there alone. It hurt, all people knew it hurt. It hurt too painfully for words, although this lone being tried to make words escape his closed throat. He had stared silently hours before while the dirt covered the coffin inside. Now he was the same, staring silently. He wasn't the type to cry. Perhaps he was unable to? It was possible, shriveled up tears ducts, damaged ones, maybe they were nonexistent, tossed aside when his mutation took affect on his green skinned, shell backed body? He, like everyone who had one pass before them, had so many things to say and he tried to say them now. But these words wouldn't change anything. He still remembered as they arrived on the bloody scene, he had reached out and felt his brother's ice cold, reptilian skin. What he didn't feel was the living heartbeat that should've been there.

This soul, the being, so young, still had fear in his eyes when he was already gone. There was no acceptance of his own death because he just didn't have the time. There were black figures around him before they had arrived at the blood soaked rooftop, each of them begging and praying for whatever being watched over them to protect their lost piece. They were all a puzzle, making up where the other was weak. Supporting them when a vital piece of their world was torn away. But now this puzzle lay incomplete. It's missing piece buried six feet under, stones and earth hiding him as if his life needed to be hidden from the sun they had all loved. So much had drove him on, the hope for a better day, the promise of the next sunrise, the next day with his family, the next night to spend with his brothers, the next moment to support the others when they fell and overall the next moment to breathe air that was so precious.

Still, this being sat quietly and alone. He would need to help his brothers. He knew that staring at the grave and thinking of the name on this gravestone would change nothing, but postpone the need to do something. For right now, he was allowed to do nothing and anything. He could be angry, he could be sad, he could be lost, he could be confident. He could be anything. That was what his brother would want right? For him to be what he wanted? He wouldn't want him to sit here and weep, he would want him and his remaining two brothers to continue the fight for life. He'd want them to go on.

Maybe it was the sudden dull darkness that blocked out the few rays of the sun that reflected off of his green skin, perhaps it was the wind that spoke of the winter-like struggle to come but a second turbulence passing through with the promise of a spring time full of life. Maybe it was his brother coming down to let common sense return. The lone humanoid turtle closed his eyes and felt an inexistent pair of arms encircle his shoulders as an invisible smiling beak pressed into his neck, reminding him that the gone presence was still here. He would wait for them, wherever they were.

But no, still, this being didn't cry. He believed his brother's presence was not only with him but there was a distant pull as if he could sense the strings that made this being reach out to the rest of his family as well. A drop fell from the turtles face as the inexistent being seemed to snuggle into him, into arms that still held a promise of protection. But this drop was not the saltwater tears that everyone in his family, but him, had cried, no it was a drop of purity from the sky above. The gray clouds covered the sun but it still shined through, because he could still feel the warmth it shared with the earth and all it's inhabitants. He was there now, watching the family, watching their friends and all the strangers that gave reason to life, that made the world what it was.

Finally, the lone turtle opened his eyes but couldn't see the figure that warmed him as he glanced at the stone in the darkness. A flash of lightning flew across the sky and he smiled as the warmth cuddled closer to him. He loved to love and his brother knew just what made him feel better. With a shaky sigh, he closed his eyes and reached out, stroking the nonexistent being's shoulder before him. With that, finally he forced aside the imaginary cotton that clogged his throat and spoke, his voice was one of wishing and longing, as if it was a magic falling star, wanting so long to be wished upon, giving that love out again, spreading more, stretching it as far as he could. He wanted his brother to hear every word.

"I love you, be happy," he whispered to the warmth.

A drop landed on his shoulder, but this salty drop was neither from his closed eyes nor from the cool sky above. The tear raced down his shoulder before running down his arm, where it outraced the cold drops that the pure, life-giving sky, sprinkled onto the world below.

"Be happy too…" a voice whispered as the warmth grew warmer by his heart before it seemed to melt into him, "I'm always with you."

The turtle took a deep breath as this new warmth settled inside his heart and opened his eyes as the clouds began to thin and more of the sun's rays began to reflect off of his wet reptilian skin and seemed to make the whole deal a lot less cold. The green skinned being glanced at the stone that sat before him before a hand landed on his shoulder.

"You've been out here for hours," a scratchy voice spoke betraying it's owners attempts to hide his misery and sorrow.

"I know," the rain dampened turtle said and then stood up, continuing to stare at the stone, not for wishes that couldn't be, but for thanks and to give honor to the being that lay beneath them.

He stared at the stone for three more seconds before turning and sliding an arm around his younger brother's shoulders, "Let's get back to the farmhouse."

Maybe he was prepared, but maybe he wasn't, the younger turtle leaned into him, burying his face in his older brother's shoulder.

"I heard him," the younger sniffed.

"I know, I did too," the older turtle said, his voice a bit scratchy from being dehydrated as he pulled his younger brother into a hug, feeling and basking in the sound of a heartbeat next to his. Both alive, both here, both near one another, both together.

They walked to the edge of the forest, the older turtle still supporting the younger, as he cried and tried but failed to stop the large, salty tears from trailing down his face. Finally they glanced back and smiled as a warmth filled both their hearts.

"LEO! RAPH! WHERE ARE YOU GUYS!" a choked voice called from a few group of trees over.

Leo turned to the voice, "Over here!" he called out and felt Raph trying desperately to wipe away the tears from his face that just wouldn't seem to stop streaming from his eyes.

A figure broke through the trees and approached them both, reaching out and wrapping his arms around his red masked older brother.

"I heard him," the third turtle said as his own tears raced down his green skinned face.

"We did too," Leo whispered and they all glanced back at the gravestone in the field before closing their eyes, letting the familiar new warmth fill their hearts.

"He's always with us," Leo said quietly, holding both his younger brothers close as they both cried and whispered their brother's name. The blue masked eldest brother looked up at the sky, daring his mind to be as powerful as his heart, and when it failed he let his heart take it's place, his own soul reaching out, embracing the new warmth as tightly as he could, knowing it would never leave him.

"Thank you for everything…"

A new wind blew in, rustling leaves on the ground as the air stream before it had done, causing flowers to release their seeds and send them on their way. Nine little petals danced in this wind, brushing past the three brothers before carrying on and circling the gravestone before settling around it, promising the constancy that there would always be life, even in the death that struck the world. Because the world was full of death and life, darkness and light, sorrow and happiness. But most of all, it was filled, with love. The love of an eternal bond that would never be broken, not ruled down by any humanoid factor like physics or any the humans' beliefs. This was something so much stronger that surrounded them all. A bond no one could know, a love no one could understand. This was a bond of brotherhood, sempiternal, invincible, pure and loving.

Behind sat a lone stone, a body beneath, but the being's soul was being carried away by his brothers. The sun pushed aside all the clouds, it's beams of light bouncing off the damp stone where a single name was carved carefully within the stone. One word, one name, that belonged to a being that held his arms out to the world.

"...Michelangelo."

* * *

You know, I'm really disappointed in this piece. I could've done a whole lot better! I'm not sure if this is how Leo would react, like I said, I have no younger siblings so I wouldn't even be able to recognize this type of grief. Sigh, I hope this is ok but it felt like I was just ranting, not writing a story.

I hope this is good enough to meet your request, Naboorulez. Sorry if it's terrible, but I tried.

Man, I can't believe I'm posting this. This story is worse than "Where's Leo?"

Oh and in case the turtles come after me in my dreams again, alternate dimension!

Sigh, flame all you want.

~Moonsetta


End file.
